Sunday, March 31, 2013

What is true Love? 005 Good Will Hunting

Date: Around March, April, 2011

List of Episodes @ Index

Sai and Hosana starts their lunch together, as others in team pre-planned to go out for Lunch. Saiyasodharan is still not recovered from the hangout of the film 'Good Will Hunting' which he saw a day before. It was one of his favorite film. Its about finding the meaning of our life, depicted in an extra ordinary way by a gifted teenager and a psychologist.

For the day's lunch discussion, he tells story of the film very briefly to her with full excitation. As always he got much excited on this topic of finding the meaning, digging deep into one's self and more than all having courage to follow it. She silently listens to everything and in the end she told Sai that she is happy for him, whatever Sai said about finding a purpose and following it will not applicable for girls. Girls are to pursue goals defined by others.

Sai can sense a slight pain behind those words. He replies "I agree with what you said, especially in our country. Sorry for that. But you shouldn't speak like this. You should fight back to follow your dreams."

Lunch time is over and they get back to their work.

Saturday, March 30, 2013

What is true love? 004 No Respect


Date: Around March, 2011

List of Episodes @ Index

One evening, Hosana was on a phone call while leaving office. She looked very upset and Saiyasodharan sensed that she is crying. It happened a couple of times before.

Next day lunch time, Hosana and Saiyasodharan were having lunch together...

Saiyasodharan asks, "I saw that you were very much upset yesterday evening. Is everything alright?"

Hosana, "yeah. I had a small fight with Jayananth Rajalingam. Its solved now."

"You people fight like frequently?"

"Yes. Very much. But it wont last for so many days. I will apologize for whatever problem we have, and it will get resolved. But he will never apologize so easily. Ego only brings problems, but not having self-respect like me is good"

Those few words thrown Saiyasodharan into deep thinking. Saiyasodharan thinks "Is she for real? How can she say that she dont have self-respect, very casually!!!".

This makes Saiyasodharan to think of various possibilities, Either Hosana is depressed or over reacting. There are so many people having depressions / inferiority complex, but will anyone give an open statement like this. He couldn't understand. He felt very very weird.

Finally, he concludes 2 different possibilities.
  • Either she is too naive to worry about social status and telling out all her thoughts, without thinking or
  • She is a Super agent, who projects herself like this for some obvious reasons, which we can see in any Hollywood movies.

Yeah, Saiyasodharan thinks weirdly like this. He love fantasies, fiction and his thoughts are completely blended with those, even in real life!

But he knows probability of 2nd option is damn too low and so he fixes on Option 1 and then he speaks back.

Saiyasodharan, "Hosana, I have one small request to you, as a friend. I really felt uncomfortable when you told like that on Self-Respect. I request you not to say like this to anyone again. And in my opinion, being egoless is good and it is not equivalent to `not having self-respect`. I suggest you to think again on this and change your attitude."

Hosana, "Sai dont worry about this too much. This is how I am. I am good for nothing. Anyway thanks for you advice. I will think about it."

Saiyasodharan "You are repeating it again. No one or nothing in this world is `Good for nothing`. Everyone has a unlimited potential, its just that we need to find where we are strong / where our `real` interests lies."

Later that day, Saiyasodharan was thinking about the whole incident. How come she was telling those words very casually. He felt pity for her. He believed it was because of her lack of confidence, she was blabbering like this. He could sense some similarities shared between his mom and Hosana in this regards. He tried a lot to change her mom for good for years, but all in vein, as she firmly believes nothing can be changed and she is too old for a change.

But Saiyasodharan strongly believes he can change Hosana and he decided to bring Confidence in her with positive words and starts speaking appropriately from that day onwards.

Friday, March 15, 2013

What is true love? 003 Hardship


Date: Around March, 2011

List of Episodes @ Index

Stalin says "Hey Sai, You saw? Hosana is crying"

Saiyasodharan "Crying? For what?"

"She is worried about the work. Not yet confident enough about her work skills"

"oh. But I think its not even 2 months since she joined. I wonder why is she worrying too much? Even we are still learning."

"namakke onnum theriyadhu. Edho ottala, andha skill ava kitta kammiya irukku da.. vera onnum illa" (Even we dont know anything, but we are somehow managing right? She doesnt have that skill).

Sai says, "yeah, she will learn it"

Behind them, Avis Manoj was speaking to her, giving positive speech, instilling confidence in her. Avis also requests Rooban Ponraj to teach her properly and not to let her feel like this again.

Saiyasodharan thinks “I dont think Rooban Ponraj has any systematic plans to train her and is taking it in an adhoc basis, which is not good. I should help her out when I get time. ”

Friday, March 8, 2013

Another perspective of Women's Day

Women are hailed as goddesses, the divine, the symbol of care and patience and are given even more higher statuses. Even we represent our country as 'Mother' India. We are all very much happy and proud of this mentions. But I personally see that all this praises, honors, etc., happen only in literature, in paper, in words but not in action, not in reality.

Reality

The harsh reality is we see women as slaves, who will maintain our house, grow up our children, wash our clothes, do all dirty works, while we pursue our life ambitions, passion, money (or whatever we like to achieve). I see women are even ripped off their basic rights (even now in Chennai majority of women are not allowed to work) . The worst thing is girls are grown up in a such a way that they themselves happily bear all these mundane taks of serving their fathers, husbands and child.
The worst thing is Majority of woman are brainwashed to believe 'looking after the family' is their purpose, while men pursue their real purposes. Women themselves have this idea of inequality incepted deep in their mind, of course, its because of the way they are grown up our corrupted society. When a guy smokes, drinks, its called heroism. But when a girl does the same, thats it, no need for me to explain. When a guy flirts with 3 girls, he is a hero; but when a girl does the same, she is a *you know what*.
From family, relatives, school, to workplace, to politics, women are harassed and bullied everywhere. In my opinion, Women's Day celebration, especially in our country is just an eyewash by the Male Chauvinistic society. (as is the Independence Day, Republic Day celebrations by our *Corrupt* leaders)

Savithribai Phule


Hope

But there is Hope. Hope given by great revolts like Raja Ram Mohan Roy (who helped cease SATI), hope given by Savitribai Phule (who opened first women school in India), Swami Vivekananda who considered men and women as two wings of a bird and said it is not possible for a bird to fly on only one wing.
Not all men are bad by heart, but the inequality is *indoctrinated* in our minds for 1000s of years. I find it little difficult even to imagine a bunch of girls smoking in a *Tea kadai*, which the guys are doing officially since time immemorial. To be honest, at first sight, I might get a negative impression about the girls. Its probably not because I am male dominant, But I am not used to such incidents of equality. But when such things happen, I will change myself. I will accept the truth, that everyone deserves a *dhum* for relaxation (men's genuine reason for wicked acts).

Demand, Protest, Fight for your Rights

Its difficult to change suddenly. Its even difficult to realize our mistakes. But we should start somewhere and make progress. So my humble suggestion is Women should come forward, tell / demand / fight for your rights, for your equality, for your life. Good men will understand and support you :-)
And this protest should start from your home, with your father, brother and then propagate to friends, school, work and to the society.
Fight for your rights and bring in a real equality, and then I shall celebrate *Women's Day*.

- A Feminist



PS: This Essay is written for a competition (part of Women's Day Celebration) in my company, Maag Studios.